Freelancing - The Freelance Rant

Murphy’s Laws of Freelancing

Posted: August 30th, 2010

Murphy’s Laws apply to all aspects of life and work. When you think about though, weren’t they made especially for freelancing? For example…

If anything can go wrong in freelancing, it will. You’ll survive though. Maybe.

Work always comes at you when you are busiest. When you are not busy at all, lots of luck to you.

As a freelancer, you are doomed to repeat history no matter how much of it you learn in advance.

Just wing it. No one will notice.

Your client told you X but he really meant Y.

You told your client X, but he really heard Y.

You really hope to earn X dollars. You really earn X – Y dollars where Y is the time in hours you spend on Twitter.

You will develop a debilitating addiction to coffee and/or cigarettes. Luckily no one will notice the tremors since you never leave the house.

Your client is willing to pay up to 110% more than what you actually charging him.

The amount of time you spend writing an estimate is inversely proportional to the likelihood that you will actually get the project.

Vacation is solely defined as the time you spend NOT working (i.e. eating, sleeping). Commonly mistaken for “trip” which must be some word in German or something.

Category: Murphy's Laws of Freelancing

Tags: freelancing, Murphy's Laws of Freelancing

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Freelancing Links You Can Shake a Stick At

Johnny

Posted: August 27th, 2010

Readhead Writing: Amidst the funny commentary is actually good advice for freelancers to suck it up and get things done. “I don’t care if you’re sitting in your house working in your bunny slippers, in the middle of a co-working space or a coffee shop devotee. It’s time to cowboy the fuck up and start acting the way you want people to treat you.”
Noupe: Some pretty convincing reasons to get that crazy thought out of your head on becoming a web designer.
I Will Teach You To Be Rich: Worried about what clients would think if you raised your rate $10 an hour? How about tripling your rate with a smile in return? It’s a no-brainer technique too.
Freelance Folder: I know I fall out of practice of searching for clients when I get busy. Here’s a nice refresher article to finding those new clients again.
Copyblogger: In freelancing, do you do any of these mistakes when marketing your business online?
VanSeoDesign: You’re not still too scared to ask for a 50% deposit before starting work are you? Understanding in depth why you have to be collecting deposits will convince you otherwise.
CSS3 Playground: In case online games get a little boring for you, you can test out those DIV blocks you had in mind.
Pushing Social: If you’re absolutely pulling your hair out trying to come up with a blog post to write, channel the boogie man instead for a sure post hit.
The Huffington Post: Hilarious graffiti photos to brighten your day. Plus a reminder to free Bill Stickers.
The Oatmeal: I definitely saved the best for last. No hints, just read it and laugh.

Category: The Week in Freelance

Tags: freelancing, Freelancing Links

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Top Ten Reasons a Freelancer Would Rather Be Back In Grade School

Johnny

Posted: August 25th, 2010

It’s that time of year again, as if those million ads you see all over the place haven’t reminded you already. Yes, back to school for the kiddies but freelancers often reminisce of those days of old. In fact, here are the top reasons we wouldn’t mind stopping by class with Mrs. Daily again.

10. Bullying kids is a little more profitable these days.

9. Could really impress other students with your Twitter follower count.

8. Might as well check back on that old teacher crush you had. You know, just to be sure.

7. Have to see in person why those damn kids are so smart nowadays.

6. Can recruit classmates to fill in on projects in exchange for candy.

5. Have to warn all the kids about the perils of getting a real job when they grow up.

4. You have excellent trade value with your stash of gourmet coffee and and Red Bull.

3. Trying to end caffeine addiction with phonics.

2. Need some new people to swoon about my iPhone to.

1. Have to warn the kids what a real nerd looks like when all grown up.

Category: The FR Ten

Tags: freelance jokes, freelancing

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The Week In Freelance: August 13th

Johnny

Posted: August 13th, 2010

Mashable: Sooner or later, you’ll run into a question you have for your own freelancing business… you know, how do I write a business plan, where do I find an affordable accountant, is murdering a client really punishable? Nice to know there are free online tools to help you with business advice.
The Positivity Blog: I don’t know of too many people who haven’t tried a Magic Pill before. I don’t mean “that” kind of pill, but a quick answer to a problem such as purchasing an ebook to help you earn more money. Sticking to a more traditional means of solving a problem or achieving a goal will more likely work out better for you.
InfoVegan.com: I’m a firm believer that it’s not your discipline that you need to concentrate on to be productive, but rather, your focus that needs to be improved.
Six Revisions: Then again, there are other useful ways to make yourself productive in freelancing.
ReenCoded: Of course, some tools to make freelancing easier would make you more productive too, wouldn’t they?
Harvard Business Review: Great article on the four phases of design thinking. “What can people in business learn from studying the ways successful designers solve problems and innovate? On the most basic level, they can learn to question, care, connect, and commit — four of the most important things successful designers do to achieve significant breakthroughs.”
Bit Rebels: If you lost or were robbed of your laptop, you’re screwed, right? Actually there’s a FireFox plugin that can track down a lost/stolen laptop plus disable those saved passwords. I’d say a must for everyone.
Web Design Dev: Did you know you can brand your tweets with your business name and URL? We’re not talking about anything regarding your username or the actual tweets themselves either.
{grow} Blog: I really hate sitting there for hours trying to come up with a blog post. Then there is nothing to show for it but a single crappy paragraph. Now it’s on to trying out a post writing technique taught from a great blogging friend that will hopefully put an end to those blocks.
PC World: You already know this but it’s always fun to make fun of yourself knowing you’re spoiled rotten by technology.
Entertonement: As if you didn’t need another distraction, here are 20 of the best online games you never heard of. Go with the Beer Pong.

Category: The Week in Freelance

Tags: freelancing, Freelancing Links

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10 Random Thoughts On Why My Freelancing Career Is As Weird As Yours

Johnny

Posted: August 11th, 2010

Photo by Bigandyherd (Flickr)

I’ve been freelancing for just over 8 years now. While I never dreamed or planned on being a freelancer, there is certainly no way I’ll ever go back to traditional employment. Looking back on those eight years, though, makes me think what a long strange trip it’s been through ten random thoughts:

I graduated with a degree in Psychology, but started freelancing doing web programming with no experience. I even write what you see here after many past failures in writing. Uhm, what just happened?
My most valued possesions are now whittled down to just a computer, Wifi, PayPal account, passport, and discipline. Sunlight, too, but I don’t really own that.
Of all my clients, who are located in Spain, USA, Canada, Australia and Sweden, I haven’t met 93% of them face-to-face.
Of those remaining 7% of clients, all except one live in the same city. I actually travelled 5266 miles once to see that last one. Not even the one in Australia either.
Out of those who I haven’t met personally, I can recognize 22% through their voice, YouTube video, photo in Facebook or a Gravatar. Who knew a “gravatar” would become a univeral means of recognition?
Probably my worst occupational hazard has been a severe addiction to caffeine and Swedish tobacco pouches (a.k.a. “snus”).
Definitely my worst occupational hazard… current withdrawals from drastically cutting back on each.
All of these will happen at least once in your career: You get stiffed on a payment, your equipment gets lost/stolen/damaged/eaten, you’ll survive a week on a $10 food budget (borrowed from a friend).
Then again, the following will also happen at least once too: You’ll find a cash cow of a client (through pure luck), you’ll truly enjoy that first vacation you take and you’ll also truly savor those meals when you begin to eat out again.
Then there is the discovery of one of Murphy’s Law of Freelancing: If there ever is a point when you are so desperate for work, that you consider the sex trade, it will be immediately followed by a period of so much work that you won’t be able to stop complaining about it.

Category: Murphy's Laws of Freelancing

Tags: freelancing, reflection, wackiness

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Top Ten Freelancing Rules To Break, Just So Things Don’t Get Boring

Johnny

Posted: July 26th, 2010

Some wise man once said that all rules were made to be broken (I know, cliche). It’s true though. Who ever got by as a freelancer by happily obeying the rules of the working world? Yet despite this career choice, there still always seems to be more rules to have to follow. Well, I give you permission to break these ten so you can get on with your career already.

10. Set and meet deadlines. If it doesn’t involve kidnappings, legislation or nuclear standoffs, then it really isn’t important in the grand scheme of things, is it?

9. Be attentive to your clients. Your clients are mature adults fully capable of handling themselves. So be repectful and treat them as so.

8. Quality is everything. Yeah, they say that at McDonalds but you still eat there right?

7. Always collect a 50% deposit at the beginning of any project. I’d think a 100% deposit would be better. You know you’ll be high-fiving me later.

6. Learn to just say no. Didn’t work during your teenage years. No sense in trying now.

5. Eliminate your work distractions. Spending hours on end on Twitter and checking up on Lindsey Lohan makes for a pretty dull life. See how distracting yourself with work turns out.

4. Take a vacation once in a while. Now would be a good time to go all crazy with Twitter and the Lindsey Lohan updates instead of doing something lame, like travel.

3. Keep up with your health. Live young forever. Spend day after day high on Red Bull and coffee and burning out your retinas. Kids are totally jealous of this.

2. Save money whenever possible. Well, have to keep up with the stash of Red Bull and coffee, right?

1. Always use a contract. Go with the pinky swear instead.

Category: The FR Ten

Tags: freelance jokes, freelancing

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The Week In Freelance: July 23rd

Johnny

Posted: July 23rd, 2010

Get Rich Slowly: Best reason to consider quitting your day job: “Last month, I took the leap. I quit my day job to write full time. Now I’m sitting in Buenos Aires writing while my kids play with their grandparents nearby. And I’m getting paid for it.” (via Lifehacker)
Freelance Folder: If you think you can get by with just your laptop and the wifi at the local Starbucks, well, there are costs to consider in freelancing. “While most freelancers experience lower start up costs than other types of businesses, nearly all freelancers will wind up having to pay some money to start and maintain their freelance business.”
Freelance Switch: Just about every freelancer goes through a slow spell… ah forget the sugar coating, a period of eating nothing but ramen noodles and wondering why the hell you’re freelancing in the first place. Don’t worry, there are some great ways you can begin to overcome these slumps.
oDesk Blog: You can almost be guaranteed of some crisis that will affect your freelance work sooner or later. Either that or be a victim of Murphy’s Law. Having a crisis plan so you’re career and income isn’t in jeopardy would therefore be a wise move. On a side note, I had my own little computer disaster that I cleanly escaped from.
P.S. Jones: If you had a bad week, then enjoy reveling in 6 things that suck about freelancing. Then get over it already.
Noupe: Whoa! The super-duper list of web development resources that escaped your attention.
The Logo Factor: Likely, if you’re an established graphic designer, at some point your work will get ripped off due to the ease of a Google image search. And if you are one of those who does this, be aware you might get caught.
Dumb Little Man: Yes, freelancers suffer from poverty at times in their careers but being time poor is often the cause.
Jon Buscall: 21 life lessons we all need to learn. Because our momma isn’t around anymore to teach them.
Zen Habits: Some very wise tips to be insanely productive and enjoy it at the same time.

Category: The Week in Freelance

Tags: freelancing, Freelancing Links

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The Week in Freelance: July 16th

Johnny

Posted: July 16th, 2010

Noupe: Great article on a truth in freelancing: we dread doing our own sales. “Most graphic artists and web designers would rather rip their toenails out than do what I do-sell. They conjure up images of being the next Billy Mays style pitchman hawking Ginsu knives at some county fair, when in truth, business to business selling is nothing like that.”
The Wealthy Freelancer: Some more thoughts to ponder… as a freelancer, are you so consumed with how to freelance that you forget WHY you’re doing it in the first place? In short, if you know your real purpose for freelancing, then you won’t be stumbling and bumbling you’re way around in your career.
Quora: Interesting thread here on why startups fail. For those of you with big ideas and dollar signs in your head for that new project or app, this is worth a read.
IceBlueBanana.com: I hate admiting to myself that, a lot of times, I’m busy all day but seem to not get much done. A handy test to see if you use your time wisely proved I might have been on Twitter a tad too long.
Freelance Folder: Telephone calls are a freelancer’s worst nightmare. A sure time killer, keeping you away from doing actual work. So, until you start charging for them, you can find ways to keep the phone calls from disrupting you.
Six Revisions: Nice tips on five files that can improve your websites, especially with SEO. These also make nice premium charges for your clients.
Freelance Switch: If you are experimenting with using social media for your marketing, then you best know these 7 mistakes that can cripple your social media reputation. Here’s an 8th: Don’t drink and tweet.
We Blog Better: Some must-reads if you are a blogger, or if you’re bored of your current blogs and need more blogs to read on blogging.
PSYBlog: If those outdoor walks in the park or trips to the museum aren’t enough to get you inspired, then tap your inner Freud and try these 7 unusual techniques to boost your creativity. Then set another appointment to follow up with 7 more.
Gigaom: Don’t you hate having to open up FireFox, Safari and (ghast) IE just so you can have multiple Gmail accounts open at the same time? Fear no more.

Category: The Week in Freelance

Tags: freelancing, Freelancing Links

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Murphy’s Laws of Freelancing

Freelancing Links You Can Shake a Stick At

Top Ten Reasons a Freelancer Would Rather Be Back In Grade School

The Week In Freelance: August 13th

10 Random Thoughts On Why My Freelancing Career Is As Weird As Yours

Top Ten Freelancing Rules To Break, Just So Things Don’t Get Boring

The Week In Freelance: July 23rd

The Week in Freelance: July 16th

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